After the success of my 1st vegan pizza, C made 2 for jam night & they were a success!

A group of at least five conformed omnivores ate & enjoyed. It makes a great breakfast cold too, right out of the fridge, just like “normal” pizza, or as I like to call it, “the tortured cow variety.”

The secret really is making your own vegan mozzarella. We used a store bought dough both times, btw. And a rolling pin to flatten & shape it. C was skeptical of this method first, but I was following the instructions on the package. Contrary to dire warnings it didn’t stick much at all. You only need to use a little flour. And if you spray the baking pan with a small bit of coconut oil it slides right off when cooked.

Accomplishments for the day so far:

  1. Finally got back in touch with my factory owner friend. I decided not to even try to price by the project. Since my overhead is so low, thanks to the generosity of my BF, I can afford to offer a low hourly rate, less than half what I’d get in NYC. 
  2. Got the missing W2 for my accountant. Had to contact Aquent for the log on info.
  3. Deposited my last check for the goddess illustrations. I’ll be working on inking those later today. I hope there’s a budget for borders because I love that client. She’s not vague. She’s got her own design sense and is a good communicator. I sent her my delivery update… 

Laying out in the sun right now. It’s a hard life! I’d have come out earlier but I was all, “Let me just look at my resume…” Even if the layout’s not 100% done in either version I’m going to print it out later to proof for content. 

Today I’ll have my 1st interview as an “out” #gray person

No exercise before hand, as planned, because I’d stayed up late watching the silly but highly enjoyable Hot Tub Time Machine 2 and I have a cat, a demanding cat. Naughty little ankle-biter is sleeping on the futon next to me right now.

Instead of working out I was researching, trying to find an interesting but text heavy resume template, preferably in InDesign. I downloaded some stuff but I need to keep thinking about it. Also need to watch a tutorial on it, via Creative Cloud website.

I’ve been using this proletariat resume in Text Edit since I over paid for that mostly useless do-over a couple months into PDX. It’s gotta be scannable bla, bla. I was willing to listen, but now I want to make it pretty again, especially if I’m going to be presenting it with an inside track on a great job. It’s likely a real person will actually read it.

This was after printing my utilitarian & not snazzy at all current version to bring to today’s meeting. It’s more of a design coordination job and seems to be a start-up situation. I’ll know more after the chat.

So I’ll either exercise later or not at all. I’m fine with having a 4-day week. I might want to just work and study and download when I get back. I might want to stop at Blick on the return trip too, and in that case it’ll take over 2 hours. (Appointment is in the NE but close-in.)

On #vegan, plant based pleasure, #tanning & other things

  • The lemon rice & Sriracha fried tofu I made last night was a hit! It was a much better meal that I’d had at the seriously over-rated Pok Pok the day before. Seriously. I kept track of what I was doing for future reference. Like I said to Charlie I guess it’s good I have lapses occasionally, because they confirm to me that non vegan food isn’t generally any yummier or more satisfying. Quite often there’s a point where I’m a bit grossed out as well, like when I get a bit of fat or tendon or something. Ewww.


  • Even though I didn’t even crack 300 with my burn from yesterday’s workout, I feel it in my hamstrings today. I got up early to maybe-exercise, only I won’t cause I’m going to retail. Doesn’t matter if this’ll be a 4-day week.
  • 1-day per week of retail is just about perfect. I wouldn’t mind low-wage, menial work so much if it didn’t seem bound & destined to come with verbal abuse & shoddy treatment. For $10 an hour, they should be happy you show up in clean clothing & are polite to the customers, especially if a company isn’t invested enough in you to even provide a regular schedule. (New Jersey just passed the $15 minimum wage btw.) I really think I’d like grocery store work much better, because there isn’t this pressure to aggressively sell, sell, sell. Anyway, I have to leave 90-min before start time today, since it’s Friday and I can’t hitch a ride.
  • I will apparently never get into biking OR driving in PDX. I could still borrow a mountain bike, but it’s a really heavy bike which is NOT good for things like climbing the massive hill. Also it’s a little too big for me, and you kind of want to feel as secure as possible if you’re going to attempt riding along a sidewalk-less, shoulder free, windy road. I also never went to get my learner’s permit for driving. The vehicle is part of the problem here as well. My sense of space is distorted. I always think I’m larger than I am, and this includes when I’m in a vehicle. Fuzzy is too damned big. Never mind that, where am I gonna drive to? I don’t earn enough money for gas & insurance, never mind paying for parking.

    And not that I have any social circle or friends I see even semi-regularly here, a car would not help me with something like happy hour. There is no way I’d drive after even a single drink. I’ve been spoiled by spending adulthood in a city with real public transportation. (I don’t miss the F train after Sandy though… The subways were great, for my spot in the East Village anyway, up until maybe five years ago.)

  • I’m tan! I have accomplished my summer goal. My back & arms especially are nicely browned. Yes, yes… I burned my boobs just a bit yesterday though, especially the right one. Also my butt cheeks because I was trying (successfully) to expose more of ’em. I’ve taken to laying out topless during the week, when the kids are both at work. There’s a nook of grass to the left of the house, just south of the greenhouse, that’s completely secluded.

It’s hard to stay glum when your surroundings look like this #pdx

I should just stop reading BoF if it’s no longer personally relevant!

First I got my mind of the what might have beens by finishing up Sekhmet in Photoshop. I’d discovered anatomical funkiness that couldn’t be corrected in watercolor & ink. Glad I took the time to fix it. Posted a couple places but I still need to update the website, Behance & Pinterest, and Dropbox to the client.

And now I’m sunbathing topless as I like to do, in this new, unanticipated existence. I regularly put tanning into my iCal, I shit you not, because when life gives you lemons, you may as well get a bitchin’ tan.

Wow! I’ve only worked out 3x this week

And instead of doing it today, I rushed out of the house to go through the long weekend process of getting to the NW via public transport. I think I left at like 9:30.  It’s now 10:42 & I’m not there yet, but I’m practically giddy to be out, making all this effort just to go sit in a cafe & read a novel while killing time. I’m meeting Charlie for lunch later at my favorite Indian place in pdx. It’s not Saravana Bhavan but it’s good.

Doubtful I’ll exercise in the early evening. Seems somehow intrusive in the shared space of the downstairs. Maybe. Who cares, right?

Gets back into bed with laptop

If I’d been more disciplined last night I could’ve totally gotten in a workout today, since I’m getting a ride & don’t have to do the 90-minute version of the 2.5 mile commute, but… Meh. Thinks back to the entrenched guilt of the Cult days. Back then my teacher & shala mates would know if I’d skipped. It’s still hard for me to believe that I paid $240 a month for yoga ten years ago, without blinking. What would that be now, $325 monthly? And that wasn’t even for 24/7 access year round. When you pay for ashtanga, you’re lucky to get 5-6 days a week access (depending on the moon schedule), past 10am, except when the teacher is: sick, on vacation, getting paid to be in two places at one time (doing a workshop elsewhere). Yoga Sutra was awesome back in the day, before Greg screwed over Christopher, only later to be shafted himself but there’s karma for you. There were two teachers, going from 6:30 to I think it was 11:30am, so if you had a day off work you didn’t still have to get up at 5 to get your fix in. That blissful situation didn’t last long, and these days AYNY can only exist in Brooklyn.

These days I’m so apathetic about everything that I’m on a 4x a week exercise plan. It’s just as easy to eat less on days I’ve got a retail shift. I used to be able to get up at 5am sharp to get in a yoga practice before a 7 or 8 hours of work but that was when I was doing design. I guess lazy & flabby goes along with unskilled labor for me.

I know regular yoga would still be good for me, but I could only manage it if I had a group, and I don’t have the budget for that.

Thinks about meditation.

Doesn’t meditate.

At least this year I will finish a themed group of 16 illustrations. There’s something.

#thermogenics #satan #XVTheDevil

I’d mentioned thermogenics in yesterday’s exercise post, but forgot to elaborate. Back in my early 30s when I was a gym rat, before the ashtanga cult sucked me in, I got a little help shedding a layer of body fat with the combination of spinning & “stackers”. I’d sometimes read mens’ fitness magazines in those days, looking for ways to tweak my system & reading product reviews. You could get ephedra in workout supplements then. It was awesome. It really works! I hadda be careful though. Just a third of the recommended daily dose made me hopped up and aggressive. 

(Worked out cause I got my first hosiery design job & had to be a ball buster to not get milked like some abused dairy cow. I never worked unpaid overtime while on salary, even as my pay scale rose. Most do.)

I was smart enough not to take six capsules a day, but there were enough people having heart attacks on treadmills to ruin it for the rest of us.

I’d like another assist & ordered the below. It’s both vegan (put your money where your mouth is) and caffeine free.

I took 1 before yesterday’s workout and 1 after, but I did get a stomach ache that lasted into the evening. I was also pretty restless trying to sleep. I’ll have to experiment with it a little & see if I can get it to work better. Maybe I just need to get used to it.

And in other news, I’ve decided to view the next couple days as fodder for writing and decision making.

5 of Disks, Page of Disks, 2 of Cups #tarot

I’m not surprised with this reading. I went to bed at 9pm last night & caught up on some needed rest, but I’m feeling restless and a little bored this morning, nothing major but it’s there. I’ll get some work done. Yesterday I’d intended to ink both Kali and Athena and stop there, but instead I got going on the watercolor washes with Kali and didn’t get to my other goddess at all.

My legs are sore, but at least I’m not all peg-legged like I was one day last summer (the day I met Charlie I could hardly walk), when I’d had my first serious introduction to pistol squats. Figures on a day I need some yoga it’s kind of cold, only 55 now. That’s great for sleeping but bad for yoga! It’s only going up to 61 too. I can’t take a rest day either cause of all the retail coming up… I haven’t lost any of that belly roll at all.

Speaking of which, if I’m going to be suffering through the standing and pacing so much I might actually spring for a real haircut for the first time since early April, 2015. I’ll go to Bishops, which is a barbershop type place that friend Susan told me about. I could also use a 3rd work shirt for summer. Of the two banker-blue, striped styles I have one is just a little bit too fitted and substantial a fabric for hot days in a no AC environment.

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Card 1, within: 5 of Disks

Introduction: The 5 of Pentacles can point to a time when life is feeling less than secure. The important thing to remember is that there is always help available when we need it, from forces both seen and unseen. You may feel alone. Yup. Even if a relationship is going well, if that is the ONLY person you interact with on a regular basis… Perhaps I should finally call a friend or something.

General: In general, the 5 of Pentacles points to a feeling of being left out in the cold, as though everyone else in the world has everything and you are the only one that is suffering.

Work: Work can be either burdensome or non-existent when this card appears, and you may be feeling stuck. Know that you do not have to stay in a situation that is not healthy or workable for you, have faith in yourself and the universe that changes are possible. That’s what I was going with when I left NYC.

Heaven is in the breast (heart chakra). Eternity is now. Look for the answer within. Find peace within. Not like I have other options anyway.

The Five of Pentacles is a Tarot Card that appears when economic times get bad. It shows up when we are losing faith in a relationship, an institution or just in ourselves. It is a card that illustrates us lacking faith in tough times.

Card 2, without: Page of Disks

Last seen in the same 2nd, “environment” position on May 31. Pentacles are the Tarot deck’s symbol of wealth, but they also represent the material plane of existence – all possessions and the practical approach to having things around.

Introduction: The Page of Pentacles can be a card about boredom, in some ways. This Page’s strength is unconditional love both for self and others, and non judgment. Assuming strength in your self, others and in situations. Project into the world calm thoughts that support rather than hinder what you want from life.

The Page of Pentacles, like the pages of all the suits, is a card of new beginnings, of inspiration and the initial stages of a creative project or venture. Pentacles correspond to the alchemical element of earth, and in this sense the coin that the Page holds may symbolize the beginnings of sensual awareness not only in terms of money and its value but also in terms of a growing awareness of the importance of health and other material needs.

Card 3, advice: 2 of Cups

Last seen on June 2nd in the 1st position.

Introduction: The 2 of Cups often refers to romantic partnership, but that is not its only connotation. It can speak of balance, friendship, joy, and sharing.

General: In general this is a card that says that things are likely to be going well. You should be feeling more than usually loved, cared for, and content.

Love: This card represents true love, balanced partnership, commitment, and all of the things that most of us hope for in regard to love and relationship. However, this does not mean that you can just do or say “whatever” and that your love/relationship will last; it only means that the underpinnings, the real, solid, potential for true love and affection is there.

When this card appears in the future position, a good outcome is almost guaranteed. The Two of Cups is a card that allows you to peer into where the subtlest energies between you and another person are going. This card’s appearance in the future position signals that those energies are about to become amplified into full-fledged infatuation, partnership or a deep commitment between you and this other person.


  1. Applied to 3 Creative Circle gigs.
  2. Learned correct, ‘Murican English pronunciation of “sycophant. It’s “sicko-fant” rather than the “psycho-fent” I thought it was, but not completely enough to not question it.
  3. Cleaned up bathroom.
  4. Vacuumed 3 rooms upstairs, exercise & jam rooms.
  5. Am now setting up to work on the ongoing Illustration project. It felt good just stapling the drawings to the homasote! It’s been too long. Heat, visitors and retail have kept me away. I’m inking Kali and Athena today.

And in other news the sun has appeared!!! I might get in some tanning today as well. I’m just a tiny bit tanned and the psychological benefits of that outweigh any possible skin detriment.

I’m really happy the temperatures have finally dropped #gratitude

It’s great in the land of very, very minimal AC. As far as the work situation goes, it’d be nice if the company would supply at least one of the free standing models so the employees could cool their damp pits on hot days, but I shouldn’t be surprised there isn’t one. Amazon warehouse pickers didn’t get that until some newspaper (I think it was) got a hold of the story about how they were always passing out at the job. If I remember right, Amazon was more willing to keep an ambulance parked outside than they were to make their low level workers comfortable. #Murica (fuck ya) invisible #bootstraps

Other things I’m grateful for, not listed in terms of any rank of importance:

  1. Charlie coming to pick me up & take me out for margaritas & Mexican right after.
  2. My relative good health (except for my vision and dental situation)
  3. Henry!
  4. The fact that I don’t have to stand and pace for hours on end today.
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